


Truth and Reconciliation

by BrennanSpeaks



Category: The Last of Us
Genre: Angst, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2020-08-04
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:40:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,855
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25710745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrennanSpeaks/pseuds/BrennanSpeaks
Summary: After the events of Part II, Ellie leaves Wyoming and finds a place to hide from her pain.Abby needs her help.  It's going to cost her.
Comments: 9
Kudos: 64





	Truth and Reconciliation

Some instinct wakes Ellie from a dead sleep. Reacting more to the unexplained adrenaline in her veins than to any logical threat, she snatches her 9mm from under her pillow and swings it up and in line with the intruder's head before sleep has even fully cleared her eyes. She blinks a few times and finds herself staring into the same face that haunted her dreams for so long. It's thinner than the one in her nightmares, but not as skeletal as when she last saw it. She draws a slow breath. "What the fuck are you doing here, Abby?"

The other woman takes a breath of her own, as if she's the one unexpectedly facing a monster. She has a handgun on her hip and a shotgun and bow over her shoulder, but she doesn't reach for either of them. "I need your help."

Ellie snorts and cocks her gun. "Now, I _have_ heard everything."

Abby looks away, then back at her. Ellie belatedly notices the olive green jacket - a slightly different shade than she'd worn with the Wolves - and the familiar armband. Black, with stylized "F"s like the wings of a beetle. The same symbol that had papered Boston with admonitions to 'look for the light.' "There's a cave network under Nevada. Hundreds of miles of tunnels. It was supposed to be the last refuge for human resistance. Naturally, it got overrun with infected three years ago."

"What's that got to do with me?"

"There was . . . supposed to be some research down there. Old files that might've changed . . . the course of things. A friend of mine went in after them, and the fucking tunnels collapsed behind him."

"Do I need to fucking repeat myself?"

"There's only one way left to get to him. Only, it's through twenty miles of spore-choked tunnels. No gas mask will get me through there. So I thought . . . well, what if I knew someone who could walk straight through the damn spores." She pauses. "I wouldn't be here if I had any other choice."

Ellie sits up in bed without letting the barrel of her gun waver. "Friend of yours, huh? Didn't know you had any of those left."

Abby's eyes flash with rage, but she chokes it back. She must really be desperate. Ellie glances around the one room cabin she's fortified. They're deep in the Sierra Nevadas, where she can't be bothered by anyone.

"How the fuck did you find me?"

"Crazy girl living in the mountains and killing clickers like she's got a vendetta? You stand out."

"There's a lot of crazy girls in the world. Did you track all of them down?"

"That kid you saved in Lake Tahoe? That got you noticed."

Ellie looks away. "Yeah. I thought it might."

The kid in Lake Tahoe was maybe fourteen. He'd slipped and fallen on a simple scouting run, cracking his gas mask deep underground. She'd gotten him out, but as soon as she emerged, blinking, into the sun with him wearing her mask, she'd known she'd have to move on. She cut ties with the Lake Tahoe group, but apparently hadn't done a good enough job of disappearing.

"I'm not interested in your little war. This friend of yours knew what he was getting into, or at least he should've."

"He's _sixteen_."

"So? I was younger when I got asked to lay down my life. All for the glorious cause, right?" She stands up and pushes past her, tucking her gun into the waistband of her pajamas.

"Oh, for _fuck's sake,_ Sarah!"

Ellie's blood freezes. She stops dead in her tracks, one hand curling into a fist. She stares at the wall and answers in a whisper. "The fuck did you just call me?"

She hears Abby's breath hiss. Her voice is very cautious. "I thought . . . I thought it was your name."

Ellie swallows, though it feels like she's being stabbed in the throat. "Yeah? And I guess I don't need to ask where you came up with that misconception."

"I'm so-"

"Don't you _fucking_ say you're sorry!" She spins, and her expression is just as murderous as it was the last time she faced her. "He talked about her. Didn't he?"

Abby stares at the rough-hewn floor. "It doesn't matter. I was wrong."

"What did he say?"

"Nothing that made _sense,_ obviously."

Ellie laughs, low and bitter. "No, you don't get to do that." Abby has gained back most of her bulk and she's carrying three deadly weapons to Ellie's one, but it doesn't matter. Ellie hits her hard in the chest with both hands, knocking her back three steps. "You were there! _You_ got to hear his last words! You don't get to _fucking keep that from me_ just because it makes you feel shitty. You tell me what he _said._ "

Abby catches her balance and stares at Ellie with a warning in her eyes. "It's not gonna make you feel any better."

"I'll live."

"Suit yourself." The other woman swallows, straightens, and turns away, pacing a few steps back and forth. "You've heard most of it from his brother. I came to Wyoming looking for them, but didn't expect to run straight into 'em on my first day there. Thought that made me so fucking lucky."

Ellie stays silent. She wants to reach for her gun. Instead, she grips her left wrist and rubs her thumb over a broken watch.

"I stayed quiet until I was back with my people. Until they were surrounded. Tommy was a talker. He wanted us to come to town, resupply, maybe make a couple friends and stay a while. Joel . . ." her voice almost catches, "He just wanted to wait out the storm and get back. Seemed real anxious about it."

Ellie waits. She's not going to make this easier on her.

"I think he knew something was up. He was casing the place, looking close at everybody. Everybody except me. I got him in the leg with the shotgun and there was this . . . moment. Where he looked at me, but he wasn't seeing _me._ And then it was over and he was just asking who the fuck we were."

"Did you tell him?"

She snorts. "Told him to _guess._ Made me wonder just how many people out there wanted him dead. And then I guess he decided he wasn't going to play that game, so he just told me to get it over with." She draws a breath that seems a little ragged. "That pissed me off. That he could just . . . brush everything off. After all that, he just wanted it to be _done_. " She shrugs. "So, I decided to make it last."

Ellie feels like she's been punched. Actually, no punch ever hurt this much. Her breath hisses out. "Oh, god."

Abby turns to stare at her. Her face is flat. Unemotional. Frozen.

Ellie draws a slow breath. "Tommy . . . he told me that was probably what happened. I didn't want to believe him. You knocked him out - there's a lot he could've missed. And Joel was a tough son of a bitch. I kept telling myself he must've fought you, and that's how . . ."

Abby's jaw clenches. "It happened. I can't change it."

Ellie looks away. Out of pure habit, her right hand closes over her last two fingers. Or, rather, the stumps where they used to be. "What did he say?"

"Hardly anything. He never asked why. I don't think he _wanted_ to know. The only thing he asked was that I not go after his family. He made me promise, actually. I thought he just meant Tommy. He never mentioned you. I don't think he wanted me to know you existed. It was only . . . after, that I put it together."

Ellie closes her eyes as a picture forms. It's bitter and horrifying, but still less painful than the nightmares her imagination has thrown at her for the past three years. At least now, she _knows._ "And Sarah?"

"He . . . he was delirious after five minutes. I kept hitting him in the head. It fucked with his perception of things. He started talking to someone nobody else could see. He said that name a few times. Never mentioned anyone else. And then you showed up, and I thought . . ." She stops and swallows hard. She has the look of a penitent. A flagellant. "Who was she?"

Ellie looks away. Slowly, like she's sleepwalking, she steps to the far wall of the cabin. Turns and jerks her head for Abby to join her.

That picture is pinned to the wall with a nail. Joel, smiling and carefree. Sarah, grinning and holding up a soccer trophy. Abby's breath hisses out. "This . . . this must've been before the outbreak."

"Yeah. She was twelve when it happened. She didn't make it."

"He looks so fucking young . . ." she stares at Ellie, "I never saw him like this."

"You never saw him at all."

"Yeah. I guess." There's something . . . broken in her expression. She stares at the photo, but she's still not seeing Joel, or at least, she's not seeing _just_ him. Her face is haunted, and it reminds Ellie of her own demons.

"Abby . . ." She trails off, second-guesses herself, then plunges on. "I didn't know. About Mel. She . . . she had her jacket zipped up. And I was focused on the guy, not her. I just wanted them to tell me where you were. And then he grabbed for my gun and she went for my knife and it all just happened too fucking fast and . . . I didn't see until it was too late."

Abby's face tightens. She lets out a shaky laugh. "Y'know . . . this whole time, I thought that was Tommy."

"Yeah. Well. Since we're being honest."

"I don't want to talk about it. It happened. You can't change it, just like I can't change anything."

Ellie closes her eyes. "You know . . . you sound exactly like him. _He_ never wanted to look back either. 'Things happen,' he used to say. 'And then we move on.' I was never good at the second part."

Abby is shaking her head. "I guess karma's got a sick sense of humor."

"You'd have liked him. If things were different."

"Yeah. Maybe."

Ellie looks away and blinks a few times. "So . . . this kid. You realize, we're probably looking for his body, right?"

"He's tough. If there's a way to survive, he'll have found it." Abby looks at her through her lashes. "And there's a _we_ now?"

Ellie glances around at the bare cabin - this place she's found where she can hide, where she won't be reminded that it's JJ's birthday or Joel's old patrol day or Dina's favorite season of the year. "I guess. What the fuck else am I doing, huh?"

Abby swallows. "Thank you. I mean that."

"Yeah, yeah. Give me a minute to put on some pants." She turns toward her dresser.

"Y'know . . . I never did catch your name."

She stares at the wall. "Ellie." She turns. "Ellie Miller."

The other woman nods. Extends her hand. "Abby Anderson." She pauses. "Can we try again?"

Ellie takes her hand. Shakes it. "We can try."

_fin_

**Author's Note:**

> As of right now, this is just a one-shot of Ellie and Abby trying to find some common ground. Maybe one of these days, I'll write the story where they combine forces, but not just yet.
> 
> Reviews and concrit are appreciated.


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